who am I kidding!

Well I wrote the title last night but was so tired that I jumped in bed only that I didn't jump into bed I watched the saved shows of Greys Anatomy and Private Practice!!!  Oh and the Voice. So 130am I am finally in bed. That is just terrible!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Anyway I had a binge on crap last night and was feeling sorry for myself. I was like "oh this is never going to happen", "maybe I have the fat gene and when I get to 107 it just says stop" I never seem to be able to budge from there. Oh the crap that was in my mind yesterday was E P I C! I went to bed resolved that it just is never going to happen for me. I am going to be fit due to my exercise but I am never going to be healthy due to my eating.

Ok so fast forward to today and VOILA

I woke up and thought don't throw in the towel.... A G A I N!!!! Leave all the negative thoughts and bad eating in yesterday. Take charge of your today!

So the morning started out with 1/2 cup oats, cup water and a scoop of protein powder. Banana cut up on top

When I took Eleanor to Preschool I thought I might go for a walk outside rather than do an inside session. I think that is what I have missed. Pushing my limits outside.

Started out so good and was going to be just a basic walk!!! um well 11.5km later and I am home!!!! EPIC journey!!!!!!

I burnt 868 calories which was not huge compared to the over 1000 I used to get walking to Eleanor's school and this was slightly longer but I'd say it was due to my HRM dropping out a fair bit due to ill fitting sports bra lifting up the transmitter. Or I'd like to think it is because I am getting fitter!!!! Oh wait it could be the weight on my monitor. I better check that. Though that theory would not work as if I am lower in weight then I'd burn less anyway. Hmm I'll check it anyway.

I felt so good! It was the best feeling and to run a fair bit on it was fabulous! I felt great jogging. Knees have some niggling pains but energy wise and strength in my legs is increasing.

So after doing that epic journey I feel back on track and no way am I doing that again! I am focused more now and will get to my goal weight in no time.

I have committed though to doing more outdoors stuff again as I like setting myself challenges doing that and I haven't been doing it. I've been doing the gym and home sessions but not much outdoors. I've done a few but not like I was. I love it and will commit to more outdoor work!

When I was having my meltdown last night I didn't even stop to think that I started out at 116.6!!!! I now weigh 107! I am obviously doing something right!! I hit the wall, made it seem harder then it is when really I am doing a great job... no a fantastic job. That is 9.6kg gone forever!!!!!

Tracy posted this to my wall and  I love it. It is so true. I am proud of my success in weight loss and know that I can so do this. I know I will do this! Positive out there. It is changing years of bad habits and how do I expect them to change in a short period of time when they have been built over years. But with dedication hard work and perseverance I will get there! Our lives will change so much with the shift in our lifestyle and that is what I need to use to keep me going. It is not just the benefits to myself in confidence, my external appearance, my health but it is the health of us all.

So I am back and here to stay!!!!!